You had no idea how broken I was. Like a butterfly touched on the wing, my fate was determined.
But you appeared, and with a few words, relit a flame long since extinguished. A wink, and my heart fluttered to life again.
As I left, I felt your eyes boring into my shoulder. I turned, and for a fleeting second you looked so deeply sad. Almost instantly, you smiled and mouthed, "goodbye".
And then I knew.
Wow, such a Big Story in so few words. Excellent Rebecca!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Deanna!
DeleteJust a hint, leaving you wanting more. The way I think flash fiction was meant to be. Great work.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much, Aaron, what a lovely comment.
DeleteOh lots said here with so few words. Very nice!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Helen!
Deleteouchy! Beautifully rendered, like the fleeting life of the butterfly itself
ReplyDeletemarc nash
Thanks, Marc! My children "raised" some caterpillars to butterflies earlier this summer. That's why the butterfly had to be included!
DeleteLovely, touching.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Alison x
DeleteLovely writing, I have the feeling these two are throwing away something that really ought to be saved.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Steve. I'm glad it made you think beyond the words too. I believe that is what flash fiction should do, when it is this sort of length.
DeleteSomehow I got my wires crossed with the butterfly imagery and a flame generally being a bad thing for a moth.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Anke, that's something I hadn't considered myself.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful imagery.
ReplyDeleteWow, beautiful... it makes me want to know the rest of the story!
ReplyDelete